The Story Of Us

Happy 100Th blog post to me! I've been wondering just what kind of blog post would be lucky enough to be such a memorable number as 100. I came to the conclusion there is nothing better than just getting back to the basics and starting from the beginning. I've never really told our story, James and mine that is. So I think it is about time to let the world know just how blessed and lucky we are to be together. I'm warning this may be long, though I wont be able to cover half of what I wish I could, it would be a novel if I did. Sit back and enjoy the story of us...

I can't really speak for James, but I was at a point in my life where I was completely content. I didn't want or need for anything. I had amazing friends, family, and I was much busier than any 19 year old college girl should be. Not saying I didn't want a relationship at some point, I just wasn't really in the market for one at that time. I guess someone had other plans in that department.

I had met James' best friend, Tony, at church several times. It wasn't until he showed up at a Halloween party the fall of my sophomore year that I really ever paid him much attention. After that he started asking me out. As I said I was a busy girl and I blew him off numerous times. I think that made him more determined to have me agree to go out with him, you know the 'they want what they can't have' thing. So After a long time I agreed. Well one date led to another and another and another.

I remember the first time I saw James. It was at church in Sunday school. I never felt like I belonged in that class, but I guess at least one good thing came of it. He was sitting with Tony's brother, Cory, and Tony across the room. I noticed him right away, partly because Tony had told me about him and partly because there was something about him that struck my attention. I didn't see him again for a while. We were at Tony's house hanging out, as usual, when I was actually introduced to him, but it would be a while before we became anything more than just acquaintances.

In the spring of my sophomore year things ended with Tony, it was not a great ending, but I am so grateful that it happened when it did. Not even a week later James was sending me messages and asking me out. I found that odd and I didn't trust him because of Tony. I guess Tony didn't put the greatest image of him in my mind either. It was only after some very good advice from my dearest friend Elizabeth that I agreed to go out with him. I will never forget what she said and I have found it to be very true, especially in this case. She told me to "go out with him. Jerks usually have good friends." So simple and so true.

I wasn't looking into it that far. He was a lot older than me, divorced, and going to Iraq within the next few months. I figured it would be one of those things that was great while it lasted, but would fizzle out soon. Circumstances were against us from the very beginning, but he was fun and so laid back. I never felt like I had to live up to expectations or be someone other than who I was. He appreciated me for me and I liked that.

The day he left for Indiana, followed by Iraq, he surprised me by showing up at my house with flowers. I expected him to be gone already, but he wanted to say goodbye to me again. He was sweet and considerate, something that many guys are lacking today and I found it very attractive.

I remember the first time I thought to myself, "I could marry this guy." However, I was also a doubting Tomas at the time. I didn't think we would last through his year in Iraq, so I refused to even take it to the next step and say we were 'in a relationship' for a long time. James was patient, completely understanding, and dealing with his own relationship demons. He knew something that I didn't though, it was that if by chance we could make it through the first year, it would be more than worth it.

Somehow he convinced me to be his girlfriend a month into him leaving. At that point I had figured he would have been so busy and into army stuff he would have forgotten about the little blond haired girl back home, but he didn't. In fact, he was so persistent and determined to send me a bunch of texts, emails, and call every day. He wasn't going to let me forget about him.

I don't know what got us through his year in Iraq. We talked as much as possible and found out a lot about each other that I think we would have missed out on if we were like every other couple. For a solid year all we had was the other's mind and conversation. Through that I feel like we developed a deep friendship that is irreplaceable.

He came home in May at the end of my junior year. Over the next year we learned even more about each other. We spent almost every day together, if we could. Here is where I think that our relationship developed farther. We learned more about each other and grew an appreciation of the other's quirks and humor. Every day I learned more and found myself fascinated with the man that he was. I saw him change too. He matured and viewed the world differently than he had even the previous year before he left for Iraq.

There was never a set time that I remember thinking or saying "I love him." It was gradual for the most part. It has been an adventure that's for sure. Every day is more exciting than the one before it. We are facing another year of him being in Iraq, but I have no doubts about it this time. We are strong and this will only making us stronger.

You know, sometimes love isn't fireworks. Sometimes, love just comes softly.

-Love Comes Softly